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Monday, November 12, 2007

Darkness


I have a problem with darkness. It scares me because I cant see, with my eyes, what is within it. It is the unknown that I fear. I encounter this physically and spiritually. Physically I experience it in the usual places, no lights on in a room or empty house, walking to and getting into my car after the sun goes down. This last one, getting into my car, is the worst. After opening my car door, I have to make sure the light inside is on, I check the back seat (every time) and when I am sure there is no one there, I get in. I have come to the understanding that it depends on whatever is going on in my life, that determines how fearful I am. Spiritually I experience this whenever I hear God speaking to me about something that I need to reconcile or dig deeper into. I am not sure, sometimes, what exactly it is that I'm getting into so I need to have complete dependence on Jesus to be with me while I am in process....to shine His light and enable me to see.
Below is a writing that "speaks to" darkness.


Darkness, why do you scare me so?
Everything I fear is in you
Albeit, I need you

I cannot see into you
When I arrive
My heart quickens its pace

Is there someone or something there?
My rationality tells me
Beware of the unseen, evil lurks within

Be a big girl, approach
There is nothing within
Nothing there to impair

Where is this voice coming from?
In a millisecond
All this conflict, I am afraid

I find a weapon to encounter you
When I push on
A light to improve you

Darkness be gone
You have no power within me
I have won this scrimmage

2 comments:

Lauren said...

I am right with you on the darkness, Jane! It's like as soon as light disapears, the entire world takes on a different appearance and everything that was bright and safe a few minutes ago, is now dark and scary and evil. I struggle with darkness in all forms, as well!! I pray for light to surround you, no matter how dark it becomes.

deAnn Alyse said...

Jane, great piece. Is the poem a "Jane Original"? It's powerful, loose and free flowing. I love it.
keep writing ~ love, deAnn