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Saturday, January 17, 2009

Blind Faith


"MY LORD GOD, I have no idea where I am going.
I do not see the road ahead of me.
I cannot know for certain where it will end.
Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think that I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so.
But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you.
And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing.
I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire.
And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road though I may know nothing about it.
Therefore will I trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death.
I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone."
Thomas Merton


The "right road" and "though I may know nothing about it". WOW, does this speak to me. It has come to my attention recently how ignorant I can be of Gods plans. How I have come to understand that His timing in not my timing. I started on a journey 16 yrs ago. Although I didn't know Jesus as my Savior, I did not have an understanding of a loving God, I basically had no thought of anything or anyone who could be higher than myself...I felt a prompting to change my life forever. This "prompting" started as a direct threat, from a person, to life as I knew it....that moved into, in hind site, a very real direction from God. What started as obedience to a person, transformed into obedience to God. I have found out recently that had I chosen to continue along my own path, I would have ceased to exist. To write the "real words" I would have died. I have often wondered why I chose the "right road". It was not an easy road, truth be told it was at times an almost unbearable road. Should further truth be told, at times....like this particular season in my life...it still is. Today, there is a difference. Today I do know Jesus as my Savior and I do have an understanding of a loving God. It makes all the difference. I know that I have been saved by grace...I know that if I continue on the "right road" by my blind faith, my reward will come.
Heavenly Father, help me to continue on the road that you have carved out for me. Help me to be grateful for salvation. Help me to remember that your plan is not my plan and that your timing is perfect. Amen